Labour is defined as the delivery of the foetus by a viviparous mammal. At Being Dad we define labour as the onset of the most memorable, yet torturous, time in a man's life. As our resident obstetrician, Professor Bennet, says, "if you want to see a great big hulking male feel impotent and completely useless, make his wife go into labour."

Television and other mainstream media have lulled man into a false sense of security when it comes to labour and birth. It's easy to think that you'll be effectively warming the bench while your partner does the hard yards and quickly delivers your baby — wrong.

There are so many combinations and permutations of birthing, pain relief and delivery options that it comes as no surprise that the labour experience is extremely varied from one couple to the next. If there is one common thread however, it's that the male will experience the following:

  • A complete sense of uselessness
  • Extreme emotional duress over the wellbeing of their partner and unborn child
  • Extreme physical exhaustion that comes with 24 hours of little or no sleep
  • A strong desire to have their own epidural and
  • The greatest single moment in their life to date

    If you are like most men you'll probably be behind in your reading and won't have actually had time to read the birthing chapter. If so, the birth can be a very disturbing time as you are confronted with decisions about forceps, suction cups, pain relief and the multitude of other possibilities. The overwhelming advice given by our dads is:

  • Be mentally prepared and physically well rested!
  • Small gestures on the day mean a lot to your partner — waterboy, masseuse, brow mopper is about all you can do
  • Watching your partner in excruciating pain is not pleasant … neither is passing a baby through your pelvis, so buck up cowboy
  • Make the most of the experience
  • Try to remember that birth is not a medical emergency, it's a natural phenomenon that has occurred billions of times before

    The labour and birth of your first child will be the most memorable experience of your life. Good preparation will only enhance the experience!

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